Who Inspires You?
Sensible people become firefighters and accountants. Not me. I went looking for unanswerable questions.
There are the questions of science and technology—about how things work—and there are others—like why things work. Sure, nature obeys laws—but because of what? God? Karma? The Universe? There are no testable answers.
As a boy I tried Jesus. Later I shifted to Marx’s communism, then Wilhelm Reich’s orgone energy—and then opened a can of alternate views—tarot and astrology, dowsing and ley lines. I went off deep end—but only for a while. Thankfully, I never got stuck.
It was the Buddha that brought me down to earth. Before encountering his thought I’d been rather afraid there were no answers. He gave me the courage to accept it.
What does that mean, he? I never encountered the man—only books by religious men—but I was lucky enough to be introduced to them by Stephen Batchelor—a fellow doubter of orthodoxy. We were monks together in Switzerland, and the more zealous our brothers became, the more pragmatic were our insights. If it weren’t for him, I'd never have lasted eight years.
I for one do not believe the Buddha had a religious bone in his body. He predicted his teaching would be misunderstood—not because he was a great seer but because he understood human nature. For many Buddhists today, the non-existence of ultimate truth is a tenet to be believed—whereas for Buddha it was a reason to let go of beliefs and tenets. The trouble with letting go is that it leaves an empty space and makes people nervous. That is nirvana—like it or not—and no, I do not capitalize it.
Letting-go may be profoundly therapeutic, but it doesn’t come easily. The fear of inner emptiness keeps you hanging on even when you want to let go. The dharma is the ultimate how-to—not philosophy, not magic; there are no spiritual gymnastics; it’s not an act of will. It’s a skillful application of effort, building momentum and integrity, taking courage, values and sacrifice. It delivers steadfastness, clarity and compassion.
Of course, all this is just my interpretation. It’s an alternative to orthodox Buddhist interpretations. But the best of all interpretations is your own. Find the Buddha’s truth in your heart, and you can put away the books.
Why does the Buddha still inspire me? Because the better I understand him, the better I understand life and the better I am at what I do.
It Begins With Silence is a ten-week Zoom class starting on September 11th. There is no fee; donations are accepted. More info here.