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The Path Between Us: An Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships Hardcover – April 10, 2018

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 2,309 ratings

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Most of us have no idea how others see or process their experiences. And that can make relationships hard, whether with intimate partners, with friends, or in our professional lives. Understanding the motivations and dynamics of these different personality types can be the key that unlocks sometimes mystifying behavior in others―and in ourselves.

This book from Suzanne Stabile on the nine Enneagram types and how they behave and experience relationships will guide readers into deeper insights about themselves, their types, and others' personalities so that they can have healthier, more life-giving relationships. No one is better equipped than Suzanne Stabile, coauthor, with Ian Morgan Cron, of The Road Back to You, to share the Enneagram's wisdom on how relationships work―or don’t.

  • Why do Sixes seem so intimidated and put off by Eights, who only wish the Sixes would stop mulling things over and take action?
  • Why do Fives seem so unavailable, even to their closest family and friends, while Twos seem to feel everybody else’s feelings but their own and end up irritating people who don’t want their help?
  • How in the world can Fours be so open and loving to you one day and restrained and distant other times?

The Enneagram not only answers these questions but gives us a way out of our usual finger pointing and judging of other people―and finding them wanting, perplexing, or impossible. Suzanne's generous, sometimes humorous, and always insightful approach reveals why all the types behave as they do. This book offers help in fostering more loving, mature, and compassionate relationships with everyone in our lives.

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From the brand


From the Publisher

the path between us, suanne stabile, enneagram
the path between us, suanne stabile, enneagram

Understand yourself and others better

Learn:

  • Stances
  • Wings
  • Triads
  • Stress & Security

Learn from Enneagram master Suzanne Stabile

'Savor every page. You, your friends and family, and the universe will all benefit!' - Richard Rohr, author of The Divine Dance.

'Suzanne has been a priceless source of wisdom in my life for many years. She is without question the best Enneagram teacher out there.' - Nadia Bolz-Weber, author of Accidental Saints.

  • Why do Eights carry so much aggression?
  • How does the One’s inner critic play out in relationships with children or spouses?
  • What does the need for predictability mean for the people in a Five's life?
  • Why is authenticity so important to a Four?
the path between us, suanne stabile, enneagram

What does your number mean to your relationships?

All relationships require translation.

Learn how the Enneagram can help you to better navigate marriage, friendship, workplace relationships, parenting relationships and more.

Suzanne Stabile speaking

Take the Next Step on the Enneagram Journey

Suzanne Stabile is a highly sought-after speaker and teacher, known for her engaging laugh, personal vulnerability, and creative approach to Enneagram instruction.

The Road Back to You cover image Speaking by the Numbers cover image Enneagram Goes to Church cover image The Path Between Us cover image The Journey Toward Wholeness cover image Spiritual Rhythms for the Enneagram cover image
The Road Back to You Speaking by the Numbers The Enneagram Goes to Church The Path Between Us The Journey Toward Wholeness Spiritual Rhythms for the Enneagram
Customer Reviews
4.7 out of 5 stars
12,921
4.7 out of 5 stars
39
4.6 out of 5 stars
71
4.7 out of 5 stars
2,309
4.7 out of 5 stars
365
4.6 out of 5 stars
305
Price $9.99 $12.49 $13.79 $12.78 $16.99 $23.59
Overview Discover Your Enneagram Number Enneagram for Public Speaking Enneagram Wisdom for Church Pastors and Leaders Your Enneagram Number in Relationships Deep Dive in the Enneagram Focusing on Triads and Stances Enneagram Triads and Spiritual Transformation
Prior Enneagram knowledge needed to read this book None Recommended Recommended Recommended Necessary Recommended
Ebook Available
Audiobook Available

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Suzanne has been a priceless source of wisdom in my life for many years. She is without question the best Enneagram teacher out there." -- Nadia Bolz-Weber, author of Accidental Saints

"Few people can teach you the Enneagram with the genuine insight, humor, and potential for real growth and change better than Suzanne Stabile! Savor every page. You, your friends and family, and the universe will all benefit!" -- Richard Rohr, Center for Action and Contemplation, Albuquerque, New Mexico

"After reading The Path Between Us, I felt like I understood my friends and family better than I have before, as well as the way I can be a better husband, father, friend, and coworker. This is a practical guide to understanding relationships through the Enneagram. This is a book you won’t just read―you’ll reference it for years to come." -- Mike McHargue, author of Finding God in the Waves, host of The Liturgists Podcast and Ask Science Mike

"Rarely have I read a book so perfectly titled. The Path Between Us helps the reader understand the sometimes complex interplay between Enneagram types. As a person who has long studied and tried to apply the Enneagram to my own relationships, this book is indeed the best guide I have found on the subject." -- James Bryan Smith, author of The Good and Beautiful God

"If you've heard of the Enneagram but never understood it, the introduction to The Path Between Us is worth the price of this book; it provides the best short introduction to the Enneagram that I’ve ever seen. Each chapter is equally amazing. If you struggle to understand and get along with anyone―spouse, child, parent, boss, coworker, employee―you will find insights into what makes them tick and how you can forge a path of connection to them. In the process, you’ll learn a lot about yourself as well. A treasure!" -- Brian D. McLaren, author of The Great Spiritual Migration

"Suzanne has a terrific way of taking the complexities of an ancient, wonderful resource and making them practical and relevant for today. I love the tool, and I love Suzanne’s way of presenting it. She is the best there is in illuminating the tangible benefits of the Enneagram." -- Paul Rasmussen, senior minister at Highland Park United Methodist, Dallas

"In our individualistic age, we often wrongly assume we can understand ourselves best through deeper self-exploration alone. Sometimes, unfortunately, the Enneagram is used in this way. My friend Suzanne Stabile understands that we are people made for relationships, and that we cannot understand who we are as individuals without better understanding others and how we relate to them. The Path Between Us offers a pathway to greater empathy, compassion, and wisdom in your relationships, and that is a gift for those who love you and for you too! I’m so grateful to have Suzanne as a friend and guide on so many of life’s most important questions. With this book, Suzanne will guide you as well." -- Michael Wear, author of Reclaiming Hope: Lessons Learned in the Obama White House About the Future of Faith in America

"While you're reading The Path Between Us, you'll be making a list in your head of all the loved ones you'll be blessing with this book. You'll want them to have it because this is deep wisdom about the human journey and yet, at the same time and as always, Suzanne offers it to us in such accessible and practical ways." -- Burt Burleson, University Chaplain and Dean of Spiritual Life at Baylor University

"In a readable and engaging flow, The Path Between Us helps me to recognize my own contested corners of difficulty as I relate to people I love and cherish. I appreciate the direct language that Suzanne Stabile uses; she never minces words and she illustrates the truths of each person through the warmth of stories people tell about themselves. You can't giggle in print, but Suzanne clearly delights in the variety of human perspectives across the Enneagram. Her enthusiasm and delight are contagious; she is the Oprah of the Enneagram." -- Suzii Paynter, executive coordinator of the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship

"Since personality shapes our formation, many of us wonder how the Enneagram can help us belong in our closest relationships. We trust Suzanne Stabile to guide us in this discovery because of her wisdom and experience, and even more because of her generosity of spirit, social intelligence, and whole-hearted love for people. The Path Between Us will help you be more compassionate toward the people in your life and yourself." -- Mark Scandrette and Lisa Scandrette, authors of Belonging and Becoming: Creating a Thriving Family Culture

"Delightful relationship guide based on the Enneagram." -- Publishers Weekly, March 12, 2018

"A fascinating view into different ways of being." -- Library Journal, March 1, 2018

Review

"Since personality shapes our formation, many of us wonder how the Enneagram can help us belong in our closest relationships. We trust Suzanne Stabile to guide us in this discovery because of her wisdom and experience, and even more because of her generosity of spirit, social intelligence, and whole-hearted love for people. The Path Between Us will help you be more compassionate toward the people in your life and yourself."

-- Mark Scandrette and Lisa Scandrette, authors of Belonging and Becoming: Creating a Thriving Family Culture

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ IVP (April 10, 2018)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0830846425
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0830846429
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 13 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 1 x 8.25 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 2,309 ratings

About the author

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Suzanne Stabile
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Suzanne Stabile, an internationally renowned teacher and director of retreats, offers a unique and creative approach to the practice of Spiritual Formation. A master teacher of the Enneagram, Suzanne draws upon her educational background at Southern Methodist University, as well as her life skills learned as a mother of four, a social worker and a minister’s spouse. Her refreshing teaching style is an unforgettable blend of humor, honesty and authenticity. She and her husband, Joseph, are the founders of Life in the Trinity Ministry and the Micah Center in Dallas, Texas.

For more information, please visit www.lifeinthetrinityministry.com or www.suzannestabile.com

For Speaking: Life in the Trinity Ministry

Phone: 214-366-3377

Email: office@lifeinthetrinityministry.com

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
2,309 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Reviewed in the United States on October 27, 2020
I was attracted to this book because… I am enjoying learning all I can about the Enneagram. Suzanne co-authored the THE ROAD BACK TO YOU. This seemed like the next logical step to take.

This book was about how the nine Enneagram personality types see and process the world. It is very revealing to realize how your type and the other eight types respond to the circumstances. First, you this book helps you understand your type’s motivations for responding and where to watch for how you can make positive impact on your own motivation.
Second, understanding how the other type see the world and respond, helps remove judgment and gives you insight into build your relationships and not tear them down.

Things I liked about this book Suzanne presents the material in an informative and entertaining way. Almost all of the antidotes, remind you of experiences of your life and your relationships. Most of the time, you are saying to yourself, ‘oh, that’s what happened.’

Why you should read this book In this life, relationships are the most important aspect of our life. You have felt at odds with both your closer family/personal relationships or in your distant professional/social relationships, this book will help you understand the conflicts. It will also give you the insight to help you take those relationships to a deep, more successful path. If you are like me, it will give you a greater desire to know more.

This book lived up to the back cover copy - I agree with the notes on the back cover. This information will lead to more life giving relationships.
5 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on August 6, 2018
This is one of the most practical books about the Enneagram I have read! The book does not just present theory's and concepts but rather provides real life, entertaining stories that illustrate the subtle differences between the Enneagram numbers and how they see the world, especially as it relates to relationships. The stories make the wisdom shared easily accessible and understandable.

One of my most favorite aspects of this book is the creative and helpful way it is structured. Too many times when I find a book that I like, I have to search back through the pages and find my highlighting or underlining to reference important points. This book does that for the reader by breaking out the chapters into the different Enneagram numbers and then highlighting important points within the text, as well as on the side of the page where it outlines key facts about how a specific number relates to other numbers. Each chapter then concludes with information about relationships for and with that specific Enneagram number.

I keep this book at my desk for easy reference. I have purchased several copies to give away to friends, and then have discovered they have done the same because they found it so helpful. I also purchased the audio book, which I highly recommend! It's great to listen to in the car on the way to work if I need a refresher and it is also helpful if I want to share about a particular number with someone - I can let them listen to that particular chapter or story. The audio book is read by the author which is another benefit because she is very easy to listen to and you can tell she is very comfortable with the material. It just fits!
11 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on April 12, 2018
Wow – there is a chapter about me and it has some tools that are helping me open up (a little) and letting others into my life.

Probably the most important insight is the awareness there are more than two ways of being in the world. I have always known there were my way and their way. But the author identifies 8 other ways other people see the world. Once I got past the embarrassment of the revelations about me, I realized the awareness of why others behave differently can help me in my relationships with my immediate family.

Some things the book has taught me about me are:
• I can “be in an intimate relationship without risking more than I can stand to lose.”
• I cannot “live my life without needing help from others at times.”
• I will have “to work to balance my thinking with some emotion and action.”

I am old enough to realize my fences will always be there and I will always need gates if I want relationships with other people. The Path Between Us has given me some keys to unlock my gates and some lights to illuminate the paths to my gates.

There is a chapter in The Path Between Us that is about you. A chapter that can help you beautify your paths so your relationships can blossom to their full potential.
103 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on December 26, 2022
I bought this as a gift, it's a great book but it was just too pricey, no other issues.
One person found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on April 21, 2018
As a therapist, I use the Enneagram as a tool in my private practice. I have seen positive changes in my client’s lives and their relationships. I recommend this book to my clients often. I also recommend it to my friends and family.

Suzanne Stabile gives us understandable, in-depth information about how we all see the world differently, react to the world differently and how this effects our relationships with others in our world.
She opens the door to her wisdom of the enneagram providing us with insight about how each specific number typically behaves in relationships along with having an understanding as to how and why others respond to us in relationships.

This book gives specific information on how each number can best get along with each other. The end of each chapter has bullet points on steps we can take to better ourselves and thus our relationships, along with things to keep in mind when relating to someone of a specific number.

Suzanne Stabile’s “The Path between Us” is a great book for everyone to read. I highly recommend this book along with her first book “The Road back to You”.
41 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on March 5, 2023
The enneagram godmother makes each number easy to understand and feel seen, whether you want to be seen or not. It has helped me understand myself, my family and my coworkers giving grace where frustration used to live.
One person found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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Alicia Tesan
5.0 out of 5 stars Yay!
Reviewed in Canada on October 4, 2020
I loved this book!
karon
5.0 out of 5 stars The best!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on November 17, 2021
This book is the best! Helps with self awareness on a high level
Lu
5.0 out of 5 stars I loved it
Reviewed in Mexico on April 25, 2020
Me encantó el libro y además me gusta mucho la versión de pasta dura, cuando lo compré estaba a un precio muy bajo, así que fue una buena compra
Amazon Kunde
3.0 out of 5 stars Insgesamt ok
Reviewed in Germany on March 26, 2019
Ich hatte das Buch als Ergänzung zum Ennegramm von Richard Rohr und Andreas Ebert gekauft. Es gibt einige interessante Ansätze in diesem Buch. Aber es hat nicht den Tiefgang, den ich erwartet hatte.
Ben Eames
4.0 out of 5 stars Really helpful
Reviewed in Australia on June 8, 2019
Some wonderful insights in here about the Enneagram, and how to get along and best support people with different personalities to our own.